Hello to those who care. I just stopped by to say "hello". Hope all is well with every one. It has taken a while to muster up the patience to type and maintain my interest. Why tonight, NO idea. Put on some Journey in the background and here I am.
In April, I was hospitalized for a reaction and a food allergy to Bell Peppers. How's that for strange. All my life, I have used peppers in cooking. Many times I used Bell or whatever was picked up. This time within minutes of eating and swallowing them I had an anaphylactic shock. My blood pressure was 170/38 when they took me away in the ambulance. I couldn't breath, was delirious and thought this was "death" announcing it had arrived. Unfortunately, I did not pass out. I was aware but semi conscious as they starting to perform tests and worked on me. They immediately put me on intravenous ( don't know what it was) then performed ekg, chest xrays and had the bed angled so my feet were elevated from my heart. I was trembling but was burning up like my body was on fire. There was no way I could speak, coherently. I knew what I wanted to say but couldn't talk. Well, here it is, I am dying and all I can think of is having someone take my thoughts and emotions down and document what it is to die. They had to take my cross off and I grabbed it to hold it. I wasn't going to die without God. I was in agony and kept saying, "God, please take me now. I never want to feel like this again." Babbling, tell my children I love them, dont forget to tell my grandkids I would watch "over them". I was soaked in perspiration from burning up, all of a sudden I was teeth chattering freezing. I couldn't cry. I was paralyzed with fear. I wanted someone to document how it felt to die before I left this earth. They were busy and not really listening to my babbling. There was no way a human being could survive what I was going through. The next thing I remember is them discussing a tracheotomy. Now, I am pissed off. No one is cutting me if I am dying. Why bother !! I was able to convey "NO". Then the nurse asked me if I wanted a DNR. What the hell is she talking about ?? Do not resuscitate me... what ! I am dying, too late now. She quitely explained to me they may need to take extraordinary measures should I suffer a heart attack or stop breathing to keep me alive. OH MY GOD !! Aren't we a little late in asking this !! There had to be a witness to my saying "let me go"!! This had to be a movie. I am dying you crazy people and now you tell me it could be worse.... Make a longer story shorter, I did not die and was home in 4 days.
I could not bring myself to put in to words what I went through on that day. It traumatized me. So for future reference my friends, it really is "decision time" when you are in the Emergency room. To this very moment, I have no idea why I did not pass out. OH, how I wish I had passed out and woke up in Heaven or Hell. Never want to go through that again. Someone, please tell me, what do I do with this ???
Recovery took about two weeks and then I started to get better and feel stronger. Decided to have some soup. I microwaved it for 2 minutes ( it's bubbling), go to take it out and it spills all over my "lightweight cotton" nightgown and scalds me from my breasts to my lower abdomen. I screamed in pain as the noodles were sticking to me. Again, here I am frozen with pain, can't move but I know I must. I run in to the bathroom and rip off the nightgown and my panties, soak a bath towel in cool water and throw it on me.
I wring the towel out and soak it again with cool water. This is going on for about 2 hours. You know I am not going to the hospital.. Then like a miracle the pain went away. I had blisters and was burned 2 layers down but felt no pain. All I could do was "thank" God. I was calm, not in pain and just looking at this massive burn on my chest, belly and below. I feel asleep in my recliner with the towel on me. Woke up and uncomfortable but not in terrible pain. Took two Aleve and a xanax and laid there for 5 or 6 hours. There is nothing any one could do so I didn't call any one. They would have thought I was crazy. I just got scalded but I am OK. When I finally called my daughter, she rushed down here and there was nothing she could do. NO, I am not going to the hospital. "Mom, that looks horrible, we have to do something." NO, I am not in pain.. I died 2 weeks ago. Well the no pain lasted for a day then all hell broke loose. I had blisters all over me, little white bubbles, a gaping hole in my skin.. so I googled it. You do not feel pain when you get a bad burn. Not for a while, then you swell. Oh yes, that bath towel saved me. It was 4 weeks ago and I am still healing. I will spare you the gory details of what you have to do with dressings and scraping. AGONY.
So here I am.. alive and mentally scarred but feel like I survived my own personal war.
I am now ready to go as long as they do not ask me any questions...
Hugs to all. Be well. Be back again.